Don’t want to be around my creepy stepdad

Dear Pastor,

I am a 25-year-old woman and I am living in Canada. When I was 17 years old, I was forced to leave home because my stepfather tried to have an affair with me and I reported him to my mother.

Luckily, my mother believed me, but he denied it. He told my mother that I was a liar. I had relatives in Canada who told my mother that they would take me to live with them. So I left home to live with my eldest brother and his girlfriend. It's the best thing that could have happened. I was able to get an education.

My mother and I have always been close. When I reported my stepfather to my mother, she threatened to kill him and go to prison. This man hated me from the moment I reported him to my mother. I have not exchanged a word with him since I was 17. Now I would like to visit my mother, but I know I cannot go to the house. All of my siblings have left, but my mother and this man are still living together.

One of my brothers told me that I should wait until he is visiting Jamaica and we can go together and stay at another place. But my mother is rather sentimental and she would love to have me for Christmas. However, my brother and his girlfriend cannot travel at that time. I do not know what to do.

I have a fiance, but he is not Jamaican and he is suggesting that I wait until we get married and then we can stay at a place on the north coast which he has heard so much about. I told my mother about my fiance's suggestion, so I am hoping to see her about that time. None of my siblings love my stepfather. Sometimes I wish he would die. Have a very merry Christmas, Pastor.

A.G.

Dear A.G.,

Merry Christmas to you too; you have a very wise mother. When your stepfather wanted you to become sexually involved with him, and you told your mother, she believed you.

When they receive complaints from their daughters, many mothers curse them and tell them that the men will never do such things. Some tell their daughters "Keep it quiet, and don't let me hear that from you again. Remember he is the one supporting us, so I can't run him." But your mother took the other position. She told him that she would destroy him.

I am glad that your siblings took you to Canada and you are doing well. I know that your mother and you are longing to see each other, but don't push the issue for this season. Accept your fiance's suggestion and plan to be with your mother in 2026. Again, have a joyous Christmas.

Pastor